I was taught that after you finish your dinner you could have a small treat. Like splitting a chocolate 3 ways. Very normal thing for my family. So, today since I got a LOT done, I am treating myself to some Blog Time! yes, go ahead and look at the time, it's 12:35am.
Not a lot of words, just photos: day out with Grandad to visit the trains.
A shower for little aunt S. Hard to believe that she is getting married!
Grandma Great and Miss Jane at the Reunion.
Hy practicing his letters at home.
Miss Jane rolling all around and loving those toes. They make the best mobile yet.
Mini-E taking a little quiet time..."this little piggie went to market..."only with her fingers.
And last but never least....8 days, NO 7 days now, until Farmboy comes home. We are thrilled!
Maybe that's the problem. It doesn't feel like it's really mine. Which, I think I can handle. I mean, I know that being a mom is more than a full-time job. I know that it requires sacrifice. A LOT of sacrifice.
Somedays I'm up for it and other days I throw in the towel just as I'm stepping out of bed. I'm no dummy, I know that for the most part it's MY fault if we have a bad day.I set the tone. I get it. But it'd be nice if I could throw the blame on someone or something else.
Three. Three has kind of put me over the edge. Or maybe it's nobody to tag team with me at the end of the day? Like, here honey, I'm clocking out...this is your shift.
Ahhh-But that's no real excuse. Plenty of people have more children & more problems (not that they go together...or do they?). So what's my deal?
Miss Jane tells it like it is....
I love photographing babies and kids. Why? because they are honest. TRUE subjects. Until they learn how to fake smile.
Check her out. Her biggest thing right now are those hands. Loves 'em. Can't get enough. I just love this stage. Everything is new and amazing and something to squeal about.
I don't wish for an easier life. But sometimes I just wish I could enjoy the simple times more fully. I fear they are slipping away all too fast. All three of them really.
Today I sat down for a minute outside & ate a Popsicle with the kids; the kind that drips everywhere and makes you feel sticky the rest of the day. HY caught every drip before it reached his hands. Mini-E chased a butterfly. Miss Jane dropped her binkie a few times but didn't care too much. And I closed my eyes & secretly wished that Farmboy would be home for dinner. Maybe late...but home. And I'd have been grateful to have fixed him anything. It must have been all that wind that made me think that life was blissful for that one split second.
I'd like to know how time goes faster after babies are out of mamma's tummy. I can't keep up with all the growth this child is doing.
I feel like such a horrible mother/photographer because the last time I really took any studio pictures of this little one was well over a month ago. I have good intentions, but somehow the rush of everyday takes precedence and I find myself not having accomplished the documentation of memories. I suppose the actual making of memories is more important.
Miss Jane has been smiling now for about a month. It's ever so fleeting, so it's difficult to catch in on camera. Nonna seems to have her heart. She's always got a giggle for Nonna. This is actually my favorite baby time. She's starting communicating and making her opinions known.
Since Farmboy has been gone, all the rules are out the window. With my first two I had strict rules about sleeping. Not so much now. I just enjoy every minute I can with this little girl. She's quite spoiled, & I am sure when daddy comes home we'll have our work cut out for us. This morning (and realistically most mornings) she can be found like this in my bed. Who can resist that face.
I have to admit that for the first time I'm really enjoying breaking all the rules and just enjoying having a little baby. If only I could freeze time.
I've fallen very behind in my updates on Farmboy and the kids and just plain life in general. The word I'm looking for is guilt. NOT because I'm not journaling (although I do feel a bit of regret because I tend to forget things if I don't get them down in writing) but guilt if I take the time to blog. I feel like my time is so precious and I never get half the things done that I mean to. I've got laundry to fold, kids to read to, and conference talks to study.... if I blog that means that I'm not getting something important done.
But, tonight I promised myself that I would journal the week that I spent with Farmboy in Missouri. The kids are in bed; the laundry is mostly done and it's only 9:40pm.
After Miss Jane was born, Farmboy and I got to speak on the phone for a little while. That was the first time that he mentioned the possibility of the 2 of us coming out to visit him after he graduated from Basic Training. It seemed like a long shot, but I did my best to make it happen and the Lord supplied the blessings that helped really make it possible. And so the Tuesday before he graduated, the baby and I took 2 planes and a 2 hour car drive so that she could meet her daddy.
Wed morning Miss Jane and I headed over to the base to find our way around and await the call. As small as Ft Leonardwood is...I still managed to spend the morning lost.
But by 1pm, Farmboy called and we met him at the PX. It was delightful to see him hold his little girl for the first time. He was so excited to meet her. I could just see it in his face how much he loved her. Strange to have it happen in a car parked in a parking lot in Missouri.
That first day, Farmboy gave us a tour of all the places he'd been the last 10 weeks. It sure was an education and nice to finally see it in person. It was a bit surreal to have him there with us in the car--a little like a dream. We ate dinner in the park and he held Miss Jane and soon it was time to say goodbye. But it wasn't a sad goodbye because we knew that we'd see each other the next day. Graduation.
Thursday was the day Farmboy graduated from Basic Training. I was sitting in the 2nd row at the front of the auditorium when the program began. Farmboy had said that if I wanted to see him that I should sit on the left side--close to the front. He had said there was a bit of surprise in the program. Oh boy! I was nervous. But when the program started I understood. Out walked Farmboy to the podium. He was the narrator for the entire program! I was shocked to see him up there. When I asked him later how he got that job he said that he'd auditioned...funny guy.
The next few days went by quickly. Sadly. We did get to hang out a lot on base and explore some back roads. We even got caught in a thunderstorm, but true to Missouri weather it didn't last very long. We had a picnic in the park, got eaten by bugs, and Miss Jane and Farmboy enjoyed a nice nap (something they both needed desperately). Visiting the USO, going to a movie, taking pictures of all of the Army Tanks for HY to see. Church on Sunday. It was wonderful to be together, but sad each night when I had to drop him off for formation. Each night knowing that we had one less day together and we'd be leaving soon. And so on Monday, we made sure to have a bit of fun.
Minature Golf in 80degree weather sounds delightful---if the humidity hadn't been enough to kill us. Poor Farmboy nearly sweat to death in his long sleeves and wool hat. But the experience was memorable and I think if we had to do it again we'd have opted for swimming.
On Monday around 5 pm I took him back to the barracks. We kissed goodbye for another 10-15 weeks...
Each week we send Farmboy a letter with photos from our life. It's nothing special, but we hope it makes him feel a little less homesick and a bit more connected to the things that are most important.
Having a new baby can be hard on some people. Getting to bed late and waking up early. And maybe waking up a few times in between. I don't mind most of it. I like how quiet and peaceful night time is. I'm a night owl and think that I always have been. Waking up early is NOT my thing.
I do enjoy the moments that I have with Miss AvaJ. I "top her off" right around 11pm or 12 am so that she'll let me sleep longer into the night. I get to hold her and tell her stories about Daddy. This is also when I get my letter writing to Farmboy done. It's really a nice time of night. Lonely, sometimes, but reflective and nice.
This particular night she slept about 6 to 7 hours straight which would have been heaven if I hadn't been up with HY all night. He had a "sick bug" as we call them in our house. And he's very proud to admit that he "puked"! He's feeling better now. We've all had it. But I think we're on the upside of it. Thankfully. I was so grateful that she slept thru this long night with my oldest not feeling well. It was tender mercy from above.
It's hard to say how much this little one has grown, but the double chin would suggest...
I love this time. It's gotta be the only time in life when people commend you for putting on a weight:
I give it 2 thumbs up...
It's official, I'm in love with someone that's chubby AND hairy.
My sweet friend gave this darling baby tutu to me as a gift. Little Miss Ava J wasn't sure she liked it at first, but I sure do! Nonna always said the name Ava J was kind of riskee..
I'm still wondering what color eyes these will be. Somedays they look blue and other days I'm not sure. My other 2 babies eyes were clearly blue. But this little one has me guessing. What do you think? Straight out of the Camera...so no color change made.
Before she was born, Daddy said that he had a dream the baby was a girl and she had brown eyes. Of course he also said she was dark headed...and I believe it's strawberry blond again. Just like the rest of our kiddos. She's certainly one of ours and we're glad we got her!
This little man is IN Love with his new sister. He wants to be with her all the time. He loves to hold her and talk to her and just give her loves. He's the best big brother.
Today he wanted to be with me when I was feeding her. He decided to get one of Mini-E's baby dolls and sit next to Mamma and feed his baby. I gave him a baby bottle and he fed his baby but soon that just wasn't good enough.
Mamma, I'm gonna pretend to be the mamma. Just pretend, okay?
And there he was "nursing" his own baby. Boppy pillow and all. And he finished up with some nice burping. He's gonna make a great dad. But for now, we might keep this little pretend mamma moment a secret from daddy.
Nah, on second hand--I think I'll write about this in the next letter.
Two weeks ago we shipped Farmboy off to Basic Training. It was a strange day knowing that we probably wouldn't be able to see him for 5 months. But I did alright. I had another "project" that I knew I had to focus on. Baby. And of course all the millions of other things I had to do to get ready for before the arrival.
Nonna moved in with me to help with the kiddos. What a blessing that has been. Then Grandma and Grandpa came to play with the kids and be there to help. I spent most my days before my due date going to work in the evenings and wondering if I would go into labor. I've never gone into labor on my own so I figured that babies just don't come...they are induced. {Clearly, mine are}.
About a week before my due date, I had a lot of pain and discomfort. I got home from teaching late that evening and told my mom. She was pretty sure we'd have a baby in the middle of the night. And because she's pretty much always right, I started to wonder myself. But, it didn't happen. But I did actually get down to business and pack a real bag for the hospital and make real plans for "just in case" I went into labor. But, I didn't. Which was a blessing because aside from having to cancel my English classes, I didn't know if Onehm would make it on time to take the pictures.
You see, once we knew that Farmboy was going to be absent for the birth of our 3rd baby, I talked with my best friend Onehm and she offered to take pictures of the labor and delivery so that we could mail them to Farmboy and help him feel apart of the day. It was a tricky plan and everything had to go just right for her to make it there on time. A sweet sweet friend of hers made it possible for her to fly in just at the right time. And I kept reminding myself of the blessing that Farmboy had given me just before he left for the Army: that everything for the labor and delivery would go the way I had planned. I kept trying to focus on that instead of worrying about the things I couldn't control.
Wed nite my English students had a big baby shower for me and I was so touched by their generosity. I went home to find Onehm had indeed made her flight and it was a go for the morning.
After my Tues morning appointment with my Dr., {almost dilated to a 3 and 80% effaced}--my instructions were to call the hospital at 6:30am to see if they could take me that morning for induction.
I couldn't sleep all night, it felt like I was waiting for Christmas morning. I made the call around 6:20am Thurs morning only to find that they were swamped with mothers. Not a room to be had for me. I was to call back at 8:30 then at 9:00. It was starting to feel like maybe we wouldn't be having this baby today. The sweet southern-accent nurse said "the flood gates had been opened that day" but that they'd get me in that day.
She did call back and we headed up to Salt Lake to begin the long waiting process. Aunt CC came to pick up Nonna, Onehm, and me---and we took the longest route to Salt Lake. Thank goodness I wasn't really in labor.
About 11:30am we were finally admitted and in Room #3. Changed. Met the nurses. Filled out papers. Got wrist bracelets.
The nurse informed me that Dr. had requested they break my water first to see if I'd progress without the Pitocin. So, water was broken and the little bit of discomfort led to the Epidural. I wasn't about to wait around for the pain to really kick in. I know I'm a pansy.
Nonna and Onehm went down to the cafeteria to get some lunch and and CC stayed with me to play a round of cards. But soon after the epidural I started to feel sick. Dizzy. Hot. Nausea. So cards would have to wait. {we never did get to play. thank goodness. she would have whipped me good. I would have blamed it on the needle in my arm, but...I never would have stood a chance with her skills and my lack of practice}. She was great to get me cool cloth and help me relax.
After a few hours, I just wasn't going anywhere. So the pitocin drip was started. And that's when the good contractions started. The nurses were taking bets on what time I'd have the baby and of course gender. {Nobody but onehm knew gender at that point}.
As good as the contractions looked, I still wasn't progressing super fast--only a 7. The nurse and Dr. Macy came in {probably around 6:15pm} and said the baby was posterior {just like with my first} and they thought that giving me a roll would help baby roll as well. That was done and I assumed to be there for a few more hours--which was fine. I was there with my favorite women and watching Blind Side. But just a few minutes later, something was odd. Pressure! A lot of pressure. So I debated what to do...I told someone.
Aunt CC ran into the hall to tell the nurses. Cheers. They rushed in. And sure enough, Ready to roll. Everything went in fast motion then. Dr. Macy broke down the bed and all of sudden there we were. Nonna and CC hold my hands on each side and a swarm of women all around me.
It was the most incredible energy I've every felt in the delivery room. Laughter. And women buzzing about working and making jokes. It was this incredible feeling of joy and calm all at the same time. And Dr. Macy said, " okay how do you want to do this...do you want to laugh, cough, cry, vomit?"....and I said, "let's laugh!" and so we did! And a few minutes later after 2 pushes and half---Dr. Macy said,
" It's a GIRL!"
Smiles and cheers. And our girl party was complete. There were Eight women in that room. Nine including the newest arrival.
Ava J
She had the greatest welcome any baby I've ever known. It was well deserved. She's special.
Calls were made. Family came. HY and Mini-E were brought to the hospital that evening to see Miss Ava j. They were delighted. HY kept saying " look at her tiny feet. tiny nose. tiny....bottom" We all giggled with delight. Mini-E hugged and kissed her. It was the most fun.
When things settled down, and everyone left for the evening {except for Nonna who stayed on the pull out}, I made a call to the Red Cross around 11pm. They said that they would get the message to Farmboy in 2-72hours about the birth of our baby girl.
I never imaged that I'd get a call from him around 4:30 the next morning. I woke up, unexpectedly around 4:00am. And noticed my phone glowing. A missed call. From Farmboy! I was devastated that I'd missed it. But soon, he called back. We spoke for about an hour. He talked about how his Drill Sargent had come in and woken him up around midnight. Yelling and screaming---he assumed he was in big trouble. Then, "Your wife had her baby"...and you can call her in the morning.
A tender mercy to be able to talk to him for as long as we did. Ava j. talked a bit as well to her daddy. Hopefully they'll meet soon. Until then, we will miss him and pray for him every day.
Miss Ava J made her grand entrance into the world last Thurs. March 25th at 6:32pm.
6lbs 7 oz 19 inches long
She was greeted by 8 strong, amazing women! Her arrival made it 9. It was the biggest girl party you've ever seen. There is nothing to compare it to. She entered this world with laughter, tears, and sisterhood.
Stay tuned for the entire story. More photos here.
Please take a peek at the video that Onehm made. She flew in just for this special occasion. It was a great blessing to have her there. She is one of the greatest women in my life. I can never thank her enough for this treasure in my life.
