Empathy & Questions
HY pushes Mini-E from the back, I am standing right there. Here we go...
HY goes to his room & I console a now even more distraught Mini-E.
A few minutes later I go into talk to HY.
He's still crying & I motion for him to sit on my lap.
"Oh boy, HY, I bet you feel so bad huh?"
"Ya, I'm so sad." he mutters out between quivers and lower lip juts.
"What happened?" keep questioning him I tell myself. Get him into his logical frontal lobe.
"You put me in my room!" Sobbing now. Clearly, I'm the bad guy here.
"Ya, I did. Why did I do that?" I'm not gonna let him turn this on me.
"I was crying & you put me in my room."
That is true, but there's more...
"Why were you crying? Did you push Mini-E?"
He pauses for a long time. "Ya, I did."
"Oh dear. I bet you feel so sad for pushing her." Empathy.
"I do, I'm so sad."
This is going well. Wonder if it's gonna backfire. Keep asking questions.
"I wonder what you could do to make her feel better, hum?"
I wait for him. He pauses & looks down.
"I need to say 'sorry'." What? Did my child just come up with that on his own?
I guess this Love & Logic thing can really work.
It was a fabulous Mamma moment. And it put me in a better mood to handle the muddy mess that occurred only minutes afterward. At least I did one thing right today.
6 comments:
Wow!!! Way to ggo Mom and HY. I try logic and it usually back fires:) Some how I am always the "BAD" guy. Fun pic. I have been checking out all your fun photos and WOWZERS girl you are amazing:)!
You are a great mom! Way to take advantage of a teaching moment!
i have taken those classes. i love them. maybe it is time for a refresher course for me. what a break thru! thanks for sharing your triumph! love it! great picture too!
LOVE this picture and that you are both wearing cowboy boots!
Oh you ARE good. VERY good.
Zoie!!! Your kids are getting so big! How are things going? It was fun to read about all of the fun adventures you have with your kids. :) Hope all is well!
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